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So last week I posted on my Facebook that we should stop running away and go back to God as He's waiting to hear from us. He wants us to continually dine with Him. How humbling is that? Therefore I embraced Him and encouraged others to do the same thing.
A trial appeared and all of a sudden I found myself running away again. I heard His calls but decided to ignore, I felt His nudges but decided to move away and ultimately I was back at square one-confused. My prior convictions, visions and decisions were clouded. Discouragement set in and I was running on auto pilot.
I'm currently undergoing something called 'the wait'. A period of time Christians frequently find themselves in according to scriptures such as Psalm 40:1-3 and Isaiah 40:31, for example.
The wait can be described as a period of silence. A moment where things appear not to be working, prayers unanswered and worship apparently blocked. Funnily enough, this is a time where deep intimacy has the potential to be built. It's in such a time you cannot depend on your feelings to know God is near as your feelings will ultimately fail you. It's a time where you evidently build your inner man. You pray till you can't pray no more, you worship till you can't find a song ('ultimately' make your own), you sacrifice till there's nothing left and you study until you close your eyes and can only see scripture. In other words you keep pressing on and keep chasing after Him. Yes Him. Not the answers to your prayers but Him.
As mentioned before, God kept calling me to talk to him, to simply pour my emotions before Him, but I declined. I think I know now that I didn't know what to say. It's situations like these that I value the scripture Romans 8:26 (NLT):
"And the Holy Spirit helps us in our weakness. For example, we don't know what God wants us to pray for. But the Holy Spirit prays for us with groanings that cannot be expressed in words."
I've read this scripture a few times but to be honest, I'm grasping the concept of this verse more and more. The Holy Spirit is aware of our weaknesses and shortcomings. Instead of judgement, He's readily available to help us. A common example described in the verse in relation to prayer accompanied with the solution. So why on earth are we running away if He's actually willing to help with even the most basic things?
Sometimes God only wants us to come. Imagine when you've had a bad day and your mother or spouse cuddles you up on the sofa with hot chocolate and holds you in the silence whilst you cry and fall asleep. It's such a comforting experience and I realise now, that's all he wanted to do.
Listen, waiting can be exhausting if you're doing it just to find an answer. So instead, wait on Him. Let Him renew your strength. Let Him revive your relationship.
But more importantly, stop running away and talk to Him.
I'll leave you with this scripture from Matthew 11:28 (NLT):
"Then Jesus said, "Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest."
Much love, peace and prayers
Rubo
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